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Manic Wednesday's

Yesterday we went to the Doctor to possibly get a diagnosis.  Unfortunately that is not a doable situation, we need to get refer to MB health for an appointment.  The Dr told me he was going to make some calls and try and fast track it somehow.  Then he sent me off to get bloodwork done and an xray.  Of course, getting bloodwork done proved to be a big assed problem without a health card.

I told Dad that we were going to the doc to talk to him about his sore knee that has been bugging him.  That worked wonders actually.  The doctor came and talked to me halfway thru the appointment.  Then sent dad home with some creme for his knee.  Magic.

Someday's its really hard not to be frustrated.  Not just with the system, but daily life.  This morning I just wanted some peace and quiet.  That's not really do-able.  I don't think it will be for awhile in all honesty.  

We get to the clinic to do the tests and the place is packed.  Dad's anxiety ramps up, and I'm doing my best to explain to him that it won't take very long.  Pointing out the board with everyone's number and that's at the most a 15 minute wait.  I'm trying to calm him down and talk to the nurse lady, get everything figured out.  She needs a copy of his health card from Alberta which disappeared when his wallet was stolen.  Thankfully I was able to pay for more data on my phone and find a picture of it somewhere in my email.  These types of outings are a 2 person job.  I was starting to get frustrated and I explained to Dad that I have ONE day off a week and WE need to get all the things done on that day.  No one is open on Sunday.  I still have to find a place to get him a chest Xray due to his nagging cough (which also scare the absolute fuck right out of me). 

After that fiasco we went for lunch.  I did manage to get a few good tidbits of news.  I emailed my MLA with what is up, the story so far and how the system is failing us.  He spoke with his PC counterpart in the legislative building who is supposed to call me by Friday. 

Thank god for the nice lady at the Alzheimer's  society who suggested the MLA thing.

I logged onto CRA and it looks like they have the payments scheduled so that is one other thing I can stop worrying about for a bit. 

Still no luck with the bank letting me take care of things.  But hey I'll take a few wins. 

Last night, I was at my witt's end and went to band practice just to get out of the house.  It seems I'm a my witt's end most Wednesdays. 

In the afternoon I had a on the spot call to go and bail someone out with a boost.  I was hesitant as I had already had a bit of a day, and attempting to drive the truck and camper in rush hour and parking it somehow in a backlane was just waaaay too much for me. 

I just want some peace. 

Last night my Mom came over and visited for a bit, which was nice.  I didn't talk to much to her, and I'm a bit upset at myself for that.  It was a much needed 20 minutes of respite.  

In the afternoon I sat in on an Alzheimer's zoom support group, which was good.  One lady was talking about how her husband get's it in his head that he is missing something.  They spend a few day's looking for it, even though he can't explain what it is he's missing.  I said to her "why don't you write on a piece of paper, here is the thing you are looking for, in big bold letters.  Then stuff it in his underwear draw".  Which resulted in a good laugh, and what seemed like a smart plan. 

I don't have any idea what my/our long term plan is at this point.  I am 100% aware that my life is never going to be the same.  I love my Dad, and most day's I'm fine with taking care of him.  I honestly have no choice in the matter at this point.  There is no one else who can take care of him.  

From what I gather, the best we can hope for at this point is: 

A diagnosis.  Which will lead to some home care.  The amount will be determined by the system.  Some people get 4 hours a week.  

From the zoom meeting, a lot of people slide super quickly.  Which is also very concerning and difficult. 

What I need to figure out is things for him to do during the day.  Everyone on the zoom call are spouses and retired, or semi retired.  Having a schedule really helps things.  Unfortunately I can't schedule him for anything, drop him off, make sure he goes etc.  Not without quitting my job.  Which I may have to take a leave or something I dunno. 

My biggest concern is him falling or having a stroke.  I know that this may push the system faster to get him into a place.  However that is extremely scary. 

At some point the stars will align we will get a bit of home care and some respite.  At some point he may wind up in a home that people can keep an eye on him 24/7.  For now, he is left to his own devices during the day.  

He asked me to drop him off so he could go grocery shopping this morning.  I reminded him that we do not need any more hotdogs or eggs. 

Hopefully he remembers.  I am going to write him a list. 

I've got an hour or less before I have to go my own Dr's appointment and then work.   I have to figure out a way to make some time for myself. 





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